Wilmas Wednesday Words of Wisdom

"Be the straw that stirs the drink"

What do I mean you may ask.

Well it ain't like this guy that's for sure...

Pugupine?

No, it's more like an attitude, a theory, a concept.

Because being the straw that stirs the drink, requires very little physical exertion. No, it is accomplished more...how can I say? With the your spirit or psyche.

In fact, it is one of the most powerful methods for mind control that I have in my wheelhouse.

When done effectively, most mortals don't even realize what is happening.

What's more, you often are able to place blame for the outcome on someone else.

Allow me to offer an example:

Like many of you all, I love food.

I am also a refined pug who isn't going to beg.

Now, there are a few things about Brigitte I can always count on.

1. She has a hard time controlling her emotions when she gets excited.

2. She barks really loud when she is excited.

3. Food excites Brigitte.

Then there is the Mom.

1.She can't tolerate Brigitte's loud, shrill, shrieking voice.

2. The louder Brigitte barks, the faster she pours the kibble.

Are you still with me people? We are almost to the pay off.

All I have to do to get fed pronto, is give Britte a little nudge. Sometimes it's a look, other times a little hmph, and BINGO Brigitte is spinning in circles screaming like a wild ban chi, and

Mom is flinging out breakfast bowls like pancakes at an all you can eat buffet. Trying to save what's left of her hearing, after surviving more 80's heavy metal concerts than she cares to admit to.

And viola' I'm fed.

You see? Minimal effort, maximum payoff.

This concept can applied to whatever situation you please.

Hear a noise and don't feel like looking into it?

Delegate.

Bored, and just looking for a little excitement?

steal a toy from one of your siblings.

Not to worry, those of you without other canine or feline counterparts.

These methods work with your humans too.

All it takes is a little observation of  human behavior and you will soon see how easily they are stirred.

And now, my fine students, you must practice what I have taught you.